Tuesday, April 07, 2015


Hazarded abroad.
            —Forrest Gander

If the cops don’t talk about
sexism, who will?  Feeling

very clear, relatively.
Email untaught me

how to complete a
sentence.  Texting

sucks.  I broke two
thumbs trying to

come up with a
cure for flying.  And

when I finally made
the discovery, it

lost me two jobs.  Disc-
rimination against drug

use (it was just a silly
anecdote about Xanax). 

What, no howl?  I
suppose I should be

in on the joke by now. 
My attempts at comedy

often run afoul.  Here,
take a look at this graph

of the people I have
offended the most.