Wednesday, June 13, 2012

mdclxx

     ...and the baby
     Cows are rehearsing
     Their lives by eating.
           —Kenneth Koch


Last night I was craving
Boston baked beans and
pumpkin seeds.  I was
destined to live in Boston—
eating ‘baked beans’ until
parched—each day of
camp.  Now a can of
cashews, half-eaten
again.  And a tube
of lipstick.  Trying
every Ben & Jerry’s
flavor that has a hint
of caramel or peanut
butter in it (which is
almost all of them?
except red velvet
cake, which I get
anyway, and WOW!).
Having lost 7 pounds
in less than 2 weeks.
Giving in to Dev
months after Otto’s
hard sell.  Realizing
our (my) odd aversion
to change.  But I love
change.  Walk around
aware of this bundle
of conflict, this body
as bundle, conflict.
So hard to get back
‘up to speed’ – so
old?  Loving my
age (22, 33, 44,...).
It’s not so hectic
today, just manic,
a maniacal simp-
licity?  My lips
too dry.  My
new favorite
songs.  A pair
of harps.  One
for my hands
and one for
my mouth.