mmmcdxlii

Now is a good time to up the ante

Isn’t it good when we up the ante?
Isn’t it good when we give ourselves
higher goals? Yeah, so now that we
have talked to Google and Apple
and T-Mobile and the person talking
to his dolls on the sidewalk of Howard
Street and been accosted by the
lady who works at the front desk of
the apartment complex in which
we live, after having been so maturely 

yelled at by her for asking her to kindly 

inform if she works in my apartment 

building because I did not recognize her 

and after being asked to see my

key, which had never happened, and 

now that I have zero dollars and
zero cents and see no cents coming

anytime soon, and now that I’ve once 

again and so publicly begun a fundraiser
in hopes to get a buck or two — my 

least favorite thing in the world, and 

now that it  has been determined that 

I was hoodwinked into buying a brand
new iPhone (I had just purchased one) 

by a rep at T-Mobile during a call in which

I triple- and double-checked all of the
price points she gave, yet when I was

sent a new phone that I was told was

free, I am instead expected to pay more
than double the price I did for the first, 

and yet now that four managers have 

informed me that there’s nothing I can 

do but pay such a price, and now that

I just had my Moderna booster shot,

which put me in bed with aches and 

fever through most of yesterday and 

some of today and since most of what
I’m telling you has transpired today, 

and now that I won’t have access to 

my email until Tuesday or Wednesday, 

so it is likely not a worthwhile venture

to look for a job until after then, and 

now that I have told you that I’ve 

probably received the last of my

unemployment, which allowed me 

to survive the pandemic and being 

laid off in March of 2020 because of it,
and now that i have told you that
the job I had which I thought was
the coolest back at the end of Sept
ember ended because “You’re not a 

good fit,” was taken from me because 

“you would really hate it” with the caveat

“I’m not psychiatrist but you should be in 

theater somewhere as corporations are clearly 

not for you” when I have happily and quite

successfully worked in corporations big and small 

for 30 years, so, well, now that you know

all of this you know what a pickle I’m

presently in and probably have some
idea how I’m doing, despite upping my

ante to as top notch as I can muster yet
knowing that now there seems to be a clear

need for more ante to be upped, my question is 

how much does it matter how much one ups the

ante, how much sweat, tears and crazy work
must one give to the all-too-often good-for-
nothings who deserve nary a notched increase
from whatever of your life they get from you 

in this lousy game — just you all wait!  So many 

fantastic things are coming, just you wait.  

It will,I am certain of it.  And so what if it doesn’t?