As The Interviewer Dives Deep,
The Interviewee Contemplates
The Deep End.
I have no idea how to answer that
question, really, how would I know,
but if I were to think about it, I can
say it has been pretty drastic. I’d
like to hope it’s been growth, it has
been progressive evolution. But,
again, how am I to know. You
ask how I’ve changed in the past
five years and I was for certain
already on the other side of
something that was nearly
impossible for me to get through,
but yet hear I am. I can say that
each year, I mean, if I look back
to the previous year, if I really
think about it, at least over the
past five years, I feel mentally
healthier than I was the year
previous. So I’ve been healing.
And maybe healing just means
growing, maturing. I think I’m
a better person, but that doesn’t
make me feel much better, I have
to tell you. It’s certainly a good
thing to feel healthier than I was
a year ago. But the surprise is
that the healing keeps going,
that I keep looking back and
thinking, wow, I have my
wits about me so much
better than I did a year
ago. So I don’t know if
that means that things
are okay now, or if I’m
only halfway there or
what. And when I
start thinking that
way...well, it feels
pretty bleak, time
feels wasted. Like,
what a waste. But if
I just think about the
fact that I feel so much...
healthier than I did a year
ago, and the fact that for
the past five years, more
than that, really, I’ve felt
that way, upon reflection,
then if I just stick with that
feeling, it’s all good. Right?
