I live by the ocean. Not
directly on the beach or
anything, but within a few
short miles, maybe five.
This new apartment is the
first place I’ve lived in 25
years in which I actually
use a heater on occasion.
I'm not sure why I men
tion that part. It is just a
thought that I had. Some
thing to communicate. This
morning is quite the occasion.
I can hear birds squawking
in the distance, a whole lot
of them, and I hear tires
screeching. Just the one
time. But otherwise, it’s
quiet. Okay, there’s an
occasional car passing
of them, and I hear tires
screeching. Just the one
time. But otherwise, it’s
quiet. Okay, there’s an
occasional car passing
in front of my apart
ment building. The
alley that i live next to,
you see, is a bit of a
sound trap. I’m a block
from the mayor’s office,
so, on weekends especially,
there are these protests,
from the mayor’s office,
so, on weekends especially,
there are these protests,
and some of them can
get pretty loud. I hear
those; I don’t get out too
much. Not like I used to.
those; I don’t get out too
much. Not like I used to.
And anyway, those birds,
they remind me of some
thing that, having grown
up in a landlocked state
they remind me of some
thing that, having grown
up in a landlocked state
in the middle of a country,
where I was born, still call
home. Well, I’m from there.
But now I’ve lived here more
where I was born, still call
home. Well, I’m from there.
But now I’ve lived here more
than I lived there. Same place,
in a way, same country. But
now it’s just that I live by the
ocean. In a city I truly love.
in a way, same country. But
now it’s just that I live by the
ocean. In a city I truly love.
With apologies to all of my
family and to everyone I grew
up with, I no longer like going
back, really. Well, it’s a bit
more complicated than that.
Some things are. Also, I’ve
been through some tough
times here. Many wonderful
times. Mostly wonderful.
But thanks to the not-so
great ones some occasion
But thanks to the not-so
great ones some occasion
al pangs get mixed in
with the love and and the
happiness and contentment
that I have about my city.
Occasionally, when that
bitterness, which never
takes me over, becomes
takes me over, becomes
just a bit of a burden, I’ll
trek out to the beach, sit
on the sand, watch the
waves roll in. Like me,
they’ve come quite a ways
to get here. And I really
appreciate them. I like the
roil and the spindrift-dark
ened beauty of it all. It
gets chilly there, most
days. I mean, I don’t go
all that much. But when
I’m there, I can just
watch it for hours, the
watch it for hours, the
massive, magical, sinister,
monstrous living thing
that is the ocean. The
one that I’m pretty
that is the ocean. The
one that I’m pretty
much always aware of,
my bearings always so
dependent on the fact
my bearings always so
dependent on the fact
of its existence in my
vicinity. It’s there. I’m
here. In a place where
I’ve withstood a few not-
so-silly challenges just to
remain. I can’t imagine
living without it. My city
and the ocean that it
touches. Yeah, that’s
what I wanted to say,
that’s what those seagulls
are telling me to tell you:
how glad I am to be here.
are telling me to tell you:
how glad I am to be here.