mmmmcmliv

watching my future
dissolve this morning
i take an alternative
tack, i dissolve into
the beauty of the city
that has, what, taken
so much from me?
has given me such
treasure?  how else
could it be to be here
for twenty-five years?
on the parchment be
tween the greenery of
trees, a heckuva frame,
i see the outline of the
golden gate bridge.  it
is a view i can own, as
if i could pluck and
plink it as if it were a
miniature harp.  what
would it sound like,
san francisco?  i have
ideas, but cannot
truly know unless i
try.  and if i were to
succeed that is the 

moment i’d finally let 

go.  of reality.  of this life.

without even hurling my
self off the distinct and
recognizable structure 

so far in the distance
from where i sit on this
russian hill bench.  should
i do it?  i think i could.  per
haps, perhaps, but i will
wait until tomorrow, i think,
when my head is clearer and
my nose a bit warmer.