but how does one find gluttony in a desert blizzard? look, what’s that ahead, just over the next butte, is it a shot of ozempic? zizzity zoopzang, albert. you’re right hilarious. i practically died laughing (of starvation).
plenty of ways one might eradicate one’s net worth, when it comes to it. number one on my list at present: your neighbor’s hot cousin. envy (he comes with—or without—a fancy sports car).
cross my name off your list. how real do you think a mask of my face might make you, might elevate your sad sack of self? alarming as it may sound to you—
oh, this is good, this is good. i’m too fucking good.
that which my name would heighten was but an ember lost in the river of lava that
clogs at the coast, rhombuses ablaze as far as the eye can see. oh, you are, indeed, full of it. you of cowardly false pride that implodes (explodes inwardly). may your heart well learn from it.
butt to his bed-linens, uncharacteristically late to rise for the day, our fallen hero, normally filled with ideas, morning to midnight, and carries a significant number of maps in hand (or pocket or backpack) of each of the elaborately detailed steps required to reach each of his high-minded goals. not today, though.
not just one serving. no. instead, nosh to your hearts desire until the
crack of dawn. and pay no heed how your limbs begin to pop perpindicular to your gut. have patience. as i swing my legs and arms like so, watch as my mouth becomes like a dump truck
and takes big honking bite after bite out of this fancy dish!
Repair Service (i know this guy, he’s got nice tools)
need some time to decompress? life’s upheaval of your pieces parts taking its toll? say no more. rush on over to
atop my bed right now and you’ll soon find your weary, devoured, devalued circuitry
brought back to outstanding, pitch-perfect synchronicity. your life’s zing will sing with such a pitch-perfect ring that you’ll feel seventeen again. while supplies last. prices vary. call a doctor pronto if you experience any bad vibes.
zinnias explode overhead! it’s a pie in the sky heaven, tonight. all the twinkles arrive from stars light years away and land here, on me, right at this very moment. so that i might radiate just enough razzle-dazzle to get me through to the end of tomorrow.
what a shitty x (friend, boyfriend, lover, whatever)!
soaring along like super- empathatic sidekicks and then blam! ghosted! incommunicado! no warning. connected soundly for long months, years, a decade or two. until...nothing.
what is that heavy, heaving, deep and absolutely mournful lingering echo out at
sea, over the ocean waters, seemingly emanating from way be neath its surface, deeper still, from its lowest gully, a singularly lonesome, heart-shredding, water-lung’d howl?
so, if i say the eighties, and then you say, yeah,the eighties, around what year, at what precise decade, what moment in time, might we be lingering as we initiate the most searing stare-downs? oh, nevermind, president alfred e “gag me with a spoon, man” neuman.
loops of daylight spun out, over and into the bay. whoever gains control of the harbor needs two thick-thighed legs that stretch high as the outlandishly tall steps apiece with a big enough body to undertake halving the darkness and securing the peninsula. as the ever-darkening intermittent tongues and troughs swallow and spew with escherian wiles.
know ye! every tongue in the sahara yearns for the same
limy sublimity. which should not, however, be inhaled, or taken half hastily, lest a desert’s mouth become, with death, empurpled. oh, these arid parts bring the insatiably lethal thirst for a dollop of key lime!
damnation! eternally, etc.! vile demons, too, and their ill-bred brethren, those who wear red hot lycra, all the worst of the fiendish lunks, who gather at trend-diminished parties
every other fry day or so. they gather at the lead-slathered bar,
each steamed-raw tongue in anticipation (it’s an egg bar, of course) for the rush of a gush so mesmerizing the gremlins almost give off a vapor of brotherhood. then, gulp! down each hot hatch go the shelled mustardy slivers—today’s hottest slam—like slick sand down each devil’s windpipe.
pray tell who belongs to this olive-colored rock? it’s so pretty, a lush green. it looks like it’s been polished with snow-capped pine by a mountain-top guru. i mean, it has lived. maybe it lived within the grasp of an eagle’s claw for a decade or two,
should eagles generally live that long? only to inevitably show up right next to us as it is here, glued to this birdbath in some elder caretaker’s long-worked goofy zen-style cocktail garden.
peas, no less. it’s easy to do here at bonanza. see the steak-house’s lime-lit buffet? they’ve the same fixins this year as last year (and perhaps even the year before that).
cars pass each other slowly over the arc of main street to night. past the dewing front lawn their headlamps seem to entrance the pair of flames enough that they dance in tandem a moment. here in the drab living room that grays eventually into the murky obsidian of night. but for the flames identically flicker-floating as they do, unlike the lazy automobiles, they dance. in the gloomy room, where four children are lined up along the hi-fi, extra-long stereo, upon which each child’s elbows rest, in this room where nothing ever happens except homework and dreaming. each kid’s pair of gleaming eyes honed at that dull arc; behind each lid brains bubble, eager